Brian was 29 yrs old when he left suddenly, leaving behind his unborn daughter,son and me.He had 2 sisters Sarah and Lisa.2 Neices and 2 Nephews.Chloe,Tyler,Dina and Christy. He loved his family very very much.His best mate was his dog.A faithfull Staffordshire Bull Terrier called Keano.Brian loved many things and as you can see in the picture one of his favourite pastimes was the xbox.He was also proud of his computer which he had self taught and built himself.He loved the outdoors and would often go walking with Keano.When he was younger he went climbing and ventured around the Pirinees in France.
This is Brian 19yrs old, Climbing In France. He loved the Outdoors.
Voices From Beyond - I Tried So Hard To Save Him. " Take a Break- Fate & Fortune March 2005"
Dear Mandy,
Last year my Partner died suddenly. I still feel guilty that i wasnt able to revive him.He was 29 and i was pregnant with our child.Does he visit us and the baby?
Mandy Replies,
Your Partner BRIAN is here and says hes always watching you and the kids.He keeps mentioning 8am and clutching his chest.He tells me there was a blockage in his arteries and he regrets not going to the doctors before, as you suggested.
He is upset he didnt get the chance to say goodbye.But he is proud his daughter has her Daddies blue eyes, and he reckons shes going to be right rebel.Hes relieved your keeping a scrapbook for her so she will know all about him. He loves you very much and apologises for not getting around to doing the garden.Hes watching over you all the while and is laughing at a child who takes ages to do his hair in the morning.
Now Mandy Has Made Contact With BRIAN, Chris Tells Him All The Things Shes been Longing To Say.........
Chris Writes,
Dear BRIAN
Im sitting here cradling our eight month old daughter K aeytlyn in my arms. I cant help but smile at the way her blue eyes twinkle whenever she lets out a little laugh-just like yours used to.
But then the guilt hits me, Brian and i tell myself over and over thats its my fault that i should have saved you. One date that will always be etched on my mind for ever is 8th April 2004. The night before we had celebrated you 29th Birthday. As you sat tucking into your cake,watching your DVD's with Jayson. you smiled. " This is the best birthday ever, Chris" You looked so happy. But perhaps you were putting on a brave face for our sake? For the past few weeks youd been getting chest pains and pins and needles down your arm. I nagged you to go to the doctors. You'd had it a year before but was told it a virus take some painkillers. When it came back you shrugged it off."Dont worry about me chris, I'll be ok " you said when i fussed.And as the wonderfull day came to a close it seemed you were too.
I remember waking up in the night and seeing you pat my tummy with a soppy grin on your face.You loved to feel our baby kicking inside me. We're definitley having a girl you used to say.You were so certain that we had even chosen a name- Kaeytlyn.
" She'll be a handfull" you warned.The girls in my family always grow up to be rebels. We had it all to look forward to. But later that morning when i got up for work at 8am, I found you on the chair in the computer room clutching your chest in pain. You were trying so hard to stay calm but the way you were huntched over i knew it must be serious.Fightened i ran downstairs to ring a doctor but when i pickedup the phone all i could hear was you on the other end-you were making a gurgling sound, stuggling for breath. "put the phone down, love" i begged. "let me call the doctor". But the only responce i got was that horrible sound.
I ran upstairs and found you lying on the floor, your face flushed, your lips already blue. you were staring straight back at me.Jayson must have heard me scream because he came running and helped me to dial 999.
I'm a Healthcare Assistant trained in Emergency First Aid and was so sure i'd be able to resuscitate you. I did everything i was taught,Chest compressions,checking pulses, breathing, mouth-to -mouth.......
Was i too anxious? was there something i did incorrectly?Why didnt you wake up?
Everything was a foggy blur as the ambulance men stretchered you away.But even as another Paramedic drove me too the hospital, i reassured myself by being convinced you were going to make it.
15 mins after i arrived at the hospital, they took me into the side room."we tried everything the doctor admitted. Hes gone.
Youre lying i spat back at them.you were too young to be snatched away like this,too young to leave our unborn child without her father.
Even when i saw you lying there on the hospital bed, i wouldnt accept it. I pulled at your arms telling you to get up so we could go home. It was my mum who pulled me of you.
The next days were unbareable i really wish i could have got drunk to numb the pain.but i had yourchild growing inside of me and i had to protect her. i was all she had now.Jayson,my best friend manda, my mum,your sister Sarah and Lisa,and the girls from work-everyone tried ti keep me giong.but it didnt take much for me to crumple into tears.
The stripped wood on the banisters where you had started the DIY, the patch in the garden where you were going to put the patio-all were reminders of what i had lost.
And two months later when i finaly went into labour, the midwife switched on the radio to soothe me. The first song tht came on was Puff Daddys- I'll Be Missing You.it was a song we played at your funeral.
i clung to that as a sign that you were there with me when finaly i gave birth to Kaeytlyn.Yet her first burp, first smile,that first time she rolled over by herself-all i could think about was how much you were missing.
Id give anything to have you back for us to be cosied up together laughing at the simpsons.But im taking comfort in the fact that Mandy says youre still here with us.At 2am one morning Jayson heard footsteps in the living room. The tv had mysteriously switched itself off without any of us touching it and recently i glimpsed a shadowy figure behind me,i did wonder.... but now i know for sure .Its you.Mandy even said that you see someone fiddling with his hair every morning. Well that can only be our Jayson, of course-he spends hours getting it all flat. I'll never get over loosing you, Brian but at least i can take comfort in the fact that youre still loving us and still watching over us.
TEARS IN HEAVEN-- ERIC CLAPYON
Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven
Will it be the same
If I saw you in heaven
I must be strong, and carry on
Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven
Would you hold my hand
If I saw you in heaven
Would you help me stand
If I saw you in heaven
I'll find my way, through night and day
Cause I know I just can't stay
Here in heaven
Time can bring you down
Time can bend your knee
Time can break your heart
Have you begging please
Begging please
(instrumental)
Beyond the door
There's peace I'm sure.
And I know there'll be no more...
Tears in heaven
Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven
Will it be the same
If I saw you in heaven
I must be strong, and carry on
Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven
Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven
TODAY, more than ever, this country needs SARAH'S LAW to give parents the legal right to know the identities of serious child sex offenders living within their community.
Although progress has been made, calls for public access to the sex offenders register have been IGNORED.
STILL 110,000 perverts are on the loose in Britain. STILL we are not allowed to know who they are. Today, Mr Blunkett, we demand you end this madness. This petition, is For Sarah and For All Our Children. please go to the site and sign the petition.
SO WHAT IS SARAH'S LAW?
Sarah's Law calls for a range of measures to curb and control paedophiles. But at its heart, we want Sarah's Law to enshrine one simple reform.
That is: Controlled Access To Information...
The LEGAL RIGHT of every parent to know the identity of serious child sex offenders living in their community.
However, with severe penalties in place for anybody who misuses this information.
Since launching our FOR SARAH campaign in July 2000, the News of the World has achieved 14 pieces of new legislation to protect our children.
Importantly, Home Secretary David Blunkett has pledged legislation to ensure no sex offender can ever be freed until it is certain they pose no risk to our children.
Here is what our For Sarah campaign has achieved so far.
But we still need YOUR help TODAY, in order to secure the last - and most important - part of our campaign: a parent's right to know if a convicted sex offender is living in their area.
Please sign the petitiomn. we cant do it without your help. 
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