Gunbound  (www.gunbound.net)

 

This totally sweet game is all about seeing who can get the dragon the fastest, since you lose if you don't have the dragon. The dragon is really hard to get (you can only get it if the game knows you're really pumped up, by either screaming into the microphone, or performing seppuku in front of your webcam). Sometimes the robots that play the game try to win without the dragon, which is impossible. Both teams will lose, if no dragon is present.

When I got the dragon this time, the other team immediately gave up.

If you've never played Gunbound before then maybe you should or maybe you shouldn't. On one hand, it's a totally sweet game that has dragons, but on the other, the robots that play can be real stupid idiots because their programmers program them to insult shots that hit dead on.

Aside from getting the dragon, you have to be good in only three of the multitude of mobiles (robots or dragons that you fight on top of), or else you're a stupid idiot. The three are:

** The Bigfoot, which shoots a million rocket-bombs and totally does a bunge attack. Your opponents and teammates alike are prone to insult you for using such a cheap tactic. This mobile has been banned in most countries because of the massive ecological annihilation it causes.

** The A.Sate, which fires a laser from a satellite which is horribly inaccurate at long ranges, and you are likely to hit everywhere except where your tracer lands. This mobile is completely taboo because if, in the off chance you make a hit, it will do 2000 damage (About half the life of a dragon).

** The Boomer, which shoots a fragile wooden boomerang that neither returns to the person that threw it, or does any damage after your dragon bites it in half before it hits. There are three categories for Boomer users: People that can't hit anything because the wind totally flips out and makes the boomerang weird, people that shoot the boomerang nearly straight up in the air so that it takes nearly 5 minutes to fall back down and hit nothing, and people that can hit any enemy dead-on in the entire map from any angle, wind direction, and situation (if an ally is very close, he would be narrowly unharmed by exactly 1 pixel). If you shotgun with this mobile (firing straight at the enemy with maximum power, instead of doing a fancy angled shot) no matter how close they are to you, then you will get mocked and laughed at for some odd reason.

Dragons are completely fearless, and keep their cool when they are outnumbered, or when a jet takes off and there is a sonic boom. If they are about to be beat, they'll kill themselves in an instant so the enemy can't capture them.

People from all over the globe (including Spain, Australia, and China) log into Gunbound to engage in friendly mortal combat in an equal team setting, riding obviously sentient mobiles that have been put into slavery and sentenced to be damaged and injured to the point of near-death over and over again, often by teammates and their own riders.

I don't care if you play this game or not, but maybe you should just for the totally sweet dragon, since the dragon is the strongest, coolest, most powerful, and sweetest mobile in the game, and that's a fact.